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Funky Chicken Alters The Course of Wall Street Insider Trading

December 17, 2019

The other day, I'm walking around New York City, and as I make my way along Second Avenue, I come across this sign for a not-yet-open business:


Chicken Insider appears to be a restaurant under construction. I say "appears" because I'm just not sure -- there's nothing on the sign to indicate exactly what the hell this establishment will be. I can't quite figure it out. Maybe it's going to be a restaurant. Maybe not. Maybe it's a storefront legal clinic for poultry? Maybe it's a newfangled Securities and Exchange Commission franchise attempting to monetize tips about insider trading? 

About that sign . . .

What's with the lower-case "a" in the word "about"? How come all the other words on the sign -- except for about -- start with an upper-case letter? 

Then there's my discomfort with the big letter "C" in the logo that wraps around both "hicken" and "insider." As I see it and read it, this establishment is Chicken Cinsider. What the hell is a Cinsider? I know that a chicken's got white meat, dark meat, giblets . . . but where exactly are the cinsiders?  And, more to the point, do I want to eat 'em?

Having gotten myself into a lather with the lower-case about and the dubious Cinsider, it was only a small step to tackling the slogan: "Insider Information Everything about Chicken"? Where are we to put the emphasis with that "everything" -- is that "Insider Information Everything" or is that "Everything about Chicken"?


So . . . just what kinda place is Chicken Cinsider (or Chicken Insider) gonna be?

Is this going to be a place where folks planning on insider trading can share a table, share some inside information, and split a whole chicken? 

Do they bring a talking chicken to your table and the vocal poultry imparts otherwise confidential information to the patrons? Might be an interesting bit of cross-marketing if the could hire Foghorn Leghorn.

If "insider trading" involves trading stock based on material nonpublic information, will the courts extend that interpretation to chicken stock?

I am open to any and all ideas about just what the hell is goin' on here.



Funky Chicken Alters The Course of Wall Street Insider Trading (BrokeAndBroker.com)

Attorney Sentenced for Fraud Scheme / Prominent Lawyer Stole Millions from Client Estates (FBI Release)

SEC Charges Former Goldman Sachs Executive With FCPA Violations (SEC Release)

FINRA NAC Affirms OHO Findings of Conversion and Misrepresentation. In the Matter of the Department of Enforcement, Complainant, v. David O. Braeger, Respondent  (FINRA NAC Decision)

Tennessee Man Sentenced To 4 Years In Prison For Defrauding Investors In A Pet Food Company And A Purported Caffeinated Snack Company Of More Than $2.9 Million / Defendant also Sentenced for Aggravated Identity Theft, a Firearm Offense, and a Narcotics Offense (DOJ Release)

Jamaican Defendant Pleads Guilty to Conspiracy to Commit Wire Fraud for Lottery Scam that Defrauded Elderly Victims (DOJ Release)

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